Now l may sound brave and all that at being able to go on this adventure. But don't for a minute think that l didn't have the "Gulp" moment. I have been taking little baby steps toward where l am at now.
I stopped by a friends last night after l had left a deposit on the van and they said "you don't seem very excited". And l wasn't, l was quiet. It could have been because l had driven so long ( three hours each way to look a the van), and as l said earlier l was a bit zonked from living in this time zone (Eastern) but working Alaska's. l was deep in thought, thinking is this it? Did l do right? Is this the van? Do l really want to travel? It's a moment of reckoning. Of course, l expect many more of those moments of reckoning/reflection to come as my life progresses.
As l wrote the blog last night announcing my purchase l was starting to get the excitement bubble. It started in the pit of my stomach and then travelled up to my chest. I live for moments like that for the moment of feeling alive.
If l made the wrong decision on the van, l can change it down the road (pun intended). If l made a wrong decision on travelling solo (cats' don't count - :-) ) l can always come home.
That is one thing that l have learned in my life, and l taught a friend of mine who had the habit of doing it, and that is to not paint yourself into corners. You can put down the paint brush at any moment and jump over the line, no one will care if you change your mind, true friends will welcome you back.
[caption id="attachment_336" align="aligncenter" width="290" caption="Painting yourself in a corner"][/caption]